Crash Commando PSN Review

What do you get if you cross Worms, Warhawk, Super Smash Bros and Bionic Commando into one game? If you said “An unplayable mess” you’d be spot on.

Crash Commando looked pretty fun in the trailers, and there is some potential here, but as released, it is full of playability and design problems, not bugs, but poorly thought through features. Here’s a list:

  • You always respawn in the same place, usually miles away from the action
  • After slogging from one end of the map to the other you can then be killed with one hit
  • You then have to wait up to 10 seconds to respawn, and take another 30 travelling back to where the action is
  • All of the weapons are basically the same, and all can kill with just one clear shot
  • Although you have an energy bar, you can die with only one shot from any of the weapons
  • Buttons for the secondary and grenade weapons are way too slow to respond
  • Many levels have areas you can fall or jetpack through that look like solid platforms, and others that you can’t passthrough that look like nothing is there
  • Often, you fall through what looked like a perfectly good floor, and find yourself falling all the way to bottom of the damn map, and having to walk and jump all the way back up again. Then you die
  • Your teammates can and will run you over in the rail-jeep or rail-tank
  • You can’t kill anyone in a vehicle, even with a rocket launcher
  • Often you’ll be the only person in your “multiplayer” game, which makes winning lots of matches and collecting lots of Trophies dead easy, if a little dull

OK so maybe that last one helps alleviate the pain, easy Trophies.